by Rich Albright
Behaviors That Signal Gridlock is Alive and Well in Your Marriage
Gridlock is a sign that you need to figure out what is behind a strongly held viewpoint.
Signs that you need to look deeper into an issue include:
The last one is a big “tell.” You think you are having a routine conversation, and your spouse has a huge emotional reaction that seems to come out of nowhere. If you get a response that doesn’t make sense, it is a clear sign that something is up. You have just hit an iceberg! Something is lurking just under the surface that you didn’t see. So, what do you do? Take a deep breath and say, “Let’s back up. It looks like this might be a deeper issue than I thought. What’s on your mind?”
This can be the first step toward effectively managing a perpetual problem and increased connection!
Next week: The Significance of the Base of the Iceberg
Signs that you need to look deeper into an issue include:
- Fighting over something trivial.
- You have found a compromise, but one or both of you undermine it.
- The topic pops up in other fights like an uninvited guest.
- You avoid certain topics “like the plague.”
- Your spouse has a surprising, out-sized reaction to something that “came out of nowhere” and catches you off guard.
The last one is a big “tell.” You think you are having a routine conversation, and your spouse has a huge emotional reaction that seems to come out of nowhere. If you get a response that doesn’t make sense, it is a clear sign that something is up. You have just hit an iceberg! Something is lurking just under the surface that you didn’t see. So, what do you do? Take a deep breath and say, “Let’s back up. It looks like this might be a deeper issue than I thought. What’s on your mind?”
This can be the first step toward effectively managing a perpetual problem and increased connection!
Next week: The Significance of the Base of the Iceberg